Believe it or not: I just had a Threesome in office

Sep 27th is and will always remain close to my heart. No, it’s not the birthdate of my girlfriend, neither had I, my first kiss today, it’s far bigger than that.   I had today, what I would call as the first “Threesome” of my life. Those who are close to me or follow my blog know that I just make fancy titles to grab attention but I can’t help it yaar , I am marketing guy and these gimmicks are in my blood now . So, if you haven’t guessed already, Threesome here stands for “Three Awesome years in SDG”.

Those who are from SDG may find my last statement much more annoying than gimmick of fake title, you must be thinking, with almost everyone cribbing about “We are not doing a real business analyst job”, “We don’t have a domain” , “ We don’t follow methodologies for project mgmt ” , how can I say last three years ,“Awesome” . I would still stand on my statement and would say, they have been more than awesome not because of the work I do, but because it gave me an opportunity to meet so many awesome people in my life, and believe me or not, 20 years down the line you may not be able to count how many BRDs you made, but you can definitely recall the best people you have met in your life.

So here I am quoting some of the best people I have met on this journey, while some of them are still with me, others have went to new pastures but I must admit , I am lucky to “Have  all of you” in my life and would cherish it always.

Foreplay: It all started with Obish Kumar, he is the culprit who encouraged me to join SDG. I cleared my interview and was in no mood to join, I thought it must be small org like my existing one and I did not wanted to join mid-level org anymore, so even after receiving offer letter I did not resigned in Prospecta. 1 week was left for joining and I told him: “I have an offer from some company called SDG but I am not joining” . He said “I also went there,mera clear nahi hua, it’s a good company , GE se kuch kuch hai.And on top of that, ek bandi hai with American accent bhot sahi, you should consider ”. That’s when I gave it a deeper thought and even after having offer for 3 weeks, resigned only 1 week before my joining and was absconding from Prospecta  hehehehe. 

 Next few lines are all about the  people I met before I joined SDG and would like to say few words about how I perceive and feel about them today three years later.

Shiva  (The American Accent): I guess “Shiva” was the one Obish spoke about, with gorgeous accent and command over the language, she is one person who can surprise you anytime with her  down to earth persona and  “Hindi Dialogues” :) :) 

Varun  Tandon (The Samsung Lover) : I met him on the day of interview , laxman asked for Resume’s and he was first one to jump, I noticed laxman is keeping it upside down, so I gave mine in the last. He was so frustrated to realize he would be among last few and I was unable to resist my laugh. Even today I tease him on this and believe it nobody ….,nobody in this world can beat his appetite for Patties and his love for Samsung phone (His phone broke on 4th day after buying and was never replaced, he has been abusing Samsung in diff languages since then !!)  

Manas : Jena was a friend, the only one I knew from Amity, In fact I called him only to ask, if I should join,he said “there is no learning but Project Manager is cool”. See…  he was a great guy, but in office it was different ,  I heard people sayin  “If Manas got 20% we should get 35%” ”  I never believed it , I would still say he is an amazing resource and  better than most of us.  

Rohit Verma: He took my second round of interview with paan in his mouth ,I did not liked him at all. But when I joined SDG, I realized he is a gem of a person and a thorough professional, even today we all admire his work and approach . Moral of the story: Never judge a book by its cover.

Anurag Sir : He took my final round and  It’s always pleasure to meet him in person (in fact I met him today only after long ),there are few things in which you can never beat him: Knowledge of anything under the sun, Login hours, size of burgers and posts on Yammers J J  

So this was it!! This was a journey before I joined; it’s just the beginning so keep cruising. 

Awesome: The first year was all about reading newspapers, novels and Nesters

Mahua Madam: Sense of humor is a rare phenomenon in females, they like others to make them laugh but she is definitely an exception, if she is in a room you can never stop laughing. I am lucky to have heard some of her humor speeches and had my share of stomachaches.

Vishal  (Beyond IIMs): Look at him and you can’t say that he is married and a father of a sexy rockstar (1 year old Veer Arjun ). Gelled hair, formal dresser he is a perfect sales guy who can sell a Sanitary Napkin to a guy, formulating its multiple use. He is one of those Filthy Rich people who don’t want to sit and enjoy an empire but want to create a new one.

Raghu (The eligible bachelor): Raghu also met us during our training period. Tall, Dark and Handsome, Raghu personifies the forthcoming   Telangana state, he is the one who enlightened me how demographics of two states are completely different. True Veteran in political knowledge and a government domain expert. :):)

Sirish (The Momo King) : How much food an average man needs to survive 3 meal and 2 cups of coffee, Sirish Majumdar is an exception, he can have 9 meals and 23 cups of coffee and every time with a different friend. Such was the  charm of Sirish majumdar, people even outside of SDG used  to come and take him out for momos, bread pakora’s , samosa and what not,but looking at his built everyone used to wonder ki itna khana jata kaha hai . Coming to the point, he is in Paris currently and has promised to bring me a beautiful French girl as a Gift.

Meetali (Ladki ya Ladka ) : Meetali was my lead when I joined SDG, usual people take 2-3 meetings to open up but meetali is wired differently, all it will take her 10 mins to know and to make you feel comfortable. Clients ko “Bottle me utarna  ” toh koi inse sikhe. Lastly the way she used to call everyone “Ladki” or “Ladke kya  chal rha hai ” has become definitely become a fad,at least in SDG

Bineeta (keep Trying): Bineeta Kundu is the only girl in this whole wide world (or Lakhimpur )  “Jo apni hi Shaadi pe saari baraat k saamne “Desi Girl” be dance kar sakti hai”. Her Laugh is so stunning that you take her to a comedy movie and entire public will not be watching a movie but you. But like every cloud there is a silver lining, there are things like Logic, Queries and talking about Try (especillay after Ranjhana ) that you can’t beat her in. 

Sir Ravi Kashyap: Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby BUT Ravi is a person who can produce 9 babies in one month and can party for rest 80 Months. My first team mate and a true veteran in technology and languages.  

Baba Alok Nagpal:  Time and again its been proved that a good mentor is very important to  take it to the next level and Alok Nagpal is one such mentor . When I was new in SDG and was tangled around the role, one beer with Alok was enough to straight it out. As time passed I realized I was no exception there are so many people (read Girls !) who love to spend time with him. Awesome Orator , he can be a motivational speaker Any Day!!!

This is a first post for the series of three, i will write "Twosome and "Threesome" about you all, only if you enjoy and like this one so keep me posted....

THE FOOTBALL RULE: FOR GIRLS ONLY

Just by looking at my Facebook page, anyone can make out that whatever little readership I have, has got more girls than guys.

Though there are some guys also who support me whole heartedly but I would rather prefer to make their Girlfriends/Wives  happy (Gaurav, Amit, Ankit,Rahul…  heheheh :) ) . So this blog is to payback all the beautiful ladies out there who really inspire me to write and get going (To name some Anjali, Ashema ,Dolly,Harjot, Megha, Priya,  Reetika …… in alphabetical order to avoid any confusions ;)).

Okay.....,so If you notice my blog closely , you will realise that my posts can majorly be bifurcated into two types, one in which there is a plot and i am getting slapped (Love Story  of BC,FC; Will you marry me etc. :)) and another in which I offer some Gyaan (How to get Europe out of recession etc.), I am afraid this one belongs to the latter category.

 Don’t take me otherwise, I have NO INTENTION/CAPABILITY   to offer  gyan  to any girl in this world (Maine marna hai kya !! Even my 3  year old Niece can beat me in a conversation ), this blog is just to highlight how guys are wired , Trust Me , I am not here to favor Guys, in fact if you think guys are worthless.I would take it a step further and say , they are useless but unfortunatley we are all driven by one Classic theory, in my words I call it .

                             “THE FOOTBALL RULE”

 It may sound too simple but honestly if you really want to understand guys just go outside and watch any game guys play/enjoy. Though, being my personal favorite,I recommend soccer but Hockey,handball,basketball they are all the same and played like this.

 In the beginning only one Guy has the ball and that is decided by destiny (remember Toss!!) so  he takes this ball out in the field , spend some time with it, take few steps with it and shows it off to the World 

However, soon as there is some pressure , sometimes a better player than him,sometimes peers shouting , sometimes the ball itself demanding some care, he starts losing his nerves. The ball now becomes a responsibility for him, he start choking, starts looking for other opportunities and  in hurry don’t even realize when the ball is gone in someone else’s hand.

For a moment,he feels relieved  nobody is there to bother him, nobody is there to curb his freedom , he don’t have to run in a specific direction (Goal Post) in short he is Khula Sand but just few steps alone and he realizes- he has committed biggest mistake of his life, nobody is actually bothered now where the hell is he going, nobody is even looking at him or bothered if  he is coming back home or not.

It is then that he starts getting restless and  realize that the ball was his life, so he runs, he runs for his life, to get the ball back, he follows it, he chases it, he fights for it, he shouts for it,becomes devdas !! but sometimes it’s really too late , the other guy, usually the experienced one, has already taken it to the goalpost (Read Marriage!!).

At that point not only him but every guy around starts feeling envious of this lucky bastard ,even if its their own team mate,they realize that, if they could have the guts to take this to the end, they would have been the winner !!!

On the other hand if you look at  Girls, right from their childhood, they love playing with Barbie’s, Teddy’s, Princess Toys  and usually are very possessive about their toys ,they don’t like believe in kicking and then running after them.

They like to keep their belongings close to their heart, even when they are sleeping.(Lucky Stuff Toys :)


So, I would like to keep it short and say , If you are dating a guy,remember he will first chase you until he gets you , once you are there,he will stop valuing you  and will start running after another balls but the moment, he realizes that YOU ARE GOING SOMEWHERE ELSE,he will start running after you again. So if really want a guy to be with you throughout your life,don't spend all your time with them,let them wander only then they will realize your importance and

if you are a guy , first of all  “Saale Maine mna kiya the padne k liye but tum saale sudhroge nhi neways girls like to keep their belongings closer to their heart, so if you really want to impress her,be around when they really need you  and then who knows when you get lucky to be that stuff toy she want to hug for rest of her life.

Cheers !!!