Barfi ke side effects.

It’s been quite some time since I wrote a blog, so by looking at the title you must be thinking Dewank pagal ho gya h, health k upar lecture de rha h . Movie freaks must be thinking that because of my limited knowledge of Hindi Cinema, I have combined two diff movies 'Barfi ' & 'Shaadi k side effects' .

But Punjabi's and particularly those who are married know and understand what it means to eat ‘Barfi’ during the engagement process. For those who do not know, eating barfi means both parties mutually agree and things could be taken to the next level. Trust me,Sometimes these unsaid rituals of engagement & marriage could be fun.


I remember, when we went to see ‘Bhabhi’, Bhai liked her a lot and in order to convey his intentions, offer karte hi, he took barfi ka sabse bada wala piece.  But all 3 bhua were in wicked mood, so in order to tease bhai, they grabbed Namkeen (Remember No Sweets No Agreement :) ) and did not allowed anyone else to have barfi until bhai was scared.  While Bhai was getting nervous & disappointed, they got up, offered the sweet to couple and blessed them lovingly. Everyone knew the plan so they burst into laughter & Bhai !!, we all  tease him on this even today.

It’s been more than 2 years since that happened  and I never imagined something of this sort would happen with me but here I am writing my own experience on  ‘Barfi, Shaadi ka interview and its side effects'

Before Rokka :)

 Bhabhi ko Jeans pehni padti hai 

It might surprise you that while looking for a girl for me, the most important topic for everyone was ‘what bhabhi is wearing ’. While we were getting ready , nobody bothered to ask (even once :)) what I am wearing but at least 15 ladies  ( including those jo Saree se niche nhi utarti ) asked Bhabhi ke 'beta Western pehen k jana  unhe bhi toh bta lage hum modern hai ’.

Bhabhi , She was confused to see aunties, who can make her wear Saree even on the Birth Anniversary of their dog (thoda zyada exaggerate ho gya :)) are asking  her to wear western but she liked  the idea and followed  them happily.

Not that I was jealous of this, rather I was happy to see my traditional family suddenly converting into a modern one but yaar koi ladke ko bhi dekh lo.

Bio Data, Telephonic round, Group interview, face to face

I got into this marriage process around 5-6 months back and was offended when someone asked to send my biodata on their mail. I thought ‘Is this an interview? why should I prepare  a one ?’  but as I grew, I realized that this process is also formalize now. It begins with preparing & sharing biodata, followed by telephonic round where families question each other (caste, creed, color, community, no of pets :)), then there is a face to face round where families eat and enjoy and couple is asked  to  sit in a corner and asked to decide their life in 15 mins conversation (come on yaar 15 mins me toh aap shirt/dress bhi nhi decide kar sakte) , finally there is group round for guy where girl’s family scrutinize him on Salary, future plans, Job Responsibilities, color of his boxers :) & guys family scrutinize girl on Shade of her lipstick :), culinary skills, walking style, mark of that pimple and what not !!  


After Rokka :)

 2-2  Mummy

Throughout life you are taught you can only have one mother though fathers can be many (2,3,4…. :)) but mother can only and only be one . But this is the beauty of the marriage, it can bring your world upside down; you suddenly have two mothers and trust me both pampers you equally. So right after eating that cute subtle burfi get ready for having two mothers in your life. I know it’s difficult, it’s been 4 days I am trying to call her mother, mummy :)  .
At the same time you should  understand it’s very very important, Imagine how you would you feel if your fiancée or your wife calls your mother ‘Aunty’ after marriage, sounds uneasy right. So Guys like it or not you should start making an effort from day one.

Star of the Year 

Since the day i joined my org , i always wanted this award but finally when i got nominated this time, i found myself competing with my own lead and another senior guy who has an amazing rapport with our manager and is known for his impeccable working style. So even before the race begin i had a feeling that i had very meager chance that i would win but on Wednesday (a day after my rokka ceremony)  when i reached office i was elated to receive the Star of the Year. Even though we have met lately but i believe i owe her this,its because of her (Read Lady Luck :)) that i got this award.


Trust me the entire process of looking for a girl is so tedious but when I look at her and more importantly, us together, I feel it’s completely worth it & it would not have been possible without you (and those cheat codes k mummy, papa, didi and bhaiya ko kaise ptana hai ;))



P.S. : Heena works with Bhai (in Fluor ) & we have been to same tuition while we were in school , never thought that 10 years later we will decide to marry but woh kehte hain na jo hota hai ache h k liye hota hai sahi kehte hai (Courtesy : Abhey Deol 1:40 ki Last Local : Look at time, i have published the blog :) )

Cheers !!

Heena & Dewank